The New Adults

  The first time I heard this word was when Drake called someone a groupie in one of his songs, I did not check for the meaning until an influencer talked about it recently The google definitions are too extreme and derogatory but in the context of what I'm talking about a groupie can be someone who always wants to be with the "happening guys". After pondering about it for a couple of days I realized we might be and this mentee, mentor, networking, your association rave in Nigeria might have turned most of us to “groupies” in a way. The need to follow the latest popping person, enter their dms and introduce yourself, ask them to mentor you or to just be able to say I know them, bla bla bla   is turning some of us into something else I don’t have much to say but I pray we remember that as we appreciate the light in others, their talents and gifts, we'll never  lose sight of the light, talents and gifts we carry too. Appreciate them but focus on making your light ...

  I know resolutions can be overrated and that’s the reason I planned to go with the normal flow from 2022 and not overwhelm myself with resolutions but on the 1st of January, 2023 I realized some areas I wanted to become better and one of them was to clean my surroundings more If I was asked to rate people according to the hygiene of their surroundings, I’ll put OCD people as Grade A, Very clean people (these ones clean everything regularly) as Grade B and Clean People like me as Grade C(We clean frequently and as the sprit leads, no routine but we maintain our surrounding). Won’t even bother to grade the rest   I plan to upgrade to Grade B this year and to achieve that I created a 2023 goals list and resolution tracker on Excel😅😅 (my level of seriousness is something else) , created actions i.e sweep my room daily and general cleaning(sweeping and mopping)   of my room, restroom, and kitchen every 3 days. This morning by 12am, I realized today was for ...

  Growing up I had a lot of sisters and one in particular was almost addicted to romantic novels. As someone that shared her love for books, I started to read them without her permission and those books made my imaginations go places I could not tell anyone and after burning several novels(my efforts to stop reading them),I finally got free in SS1 and since then till 500 level, at the sight of brown paper, I   RUN. Some weeks ago, I walked into my course mate’s room and saw two romantic novels, I shared my experience and applauded myself when I felt no temptation to go back to them. Today, I had a really rough day, and I just wanted something to take my mind off things. So I went to my course mates room, picked one book “I have a bible full of stories on my bed but it’s the novel I went for, mtcheww” and started reading, in less than 20 minutes your girl was done with the book. How? Well, the things that made blood rush through my veins, pissed me off. I mean the love...

  My exams on Wednesday and Friday had not gone as planned both of them left me feeling like I did not read enough, I felt like a failure and had no interest in showing my face to God at the thanksgivings done after every exam in chapel. Nevertheless, my course mate motivated me to attend the thanksgiving towards the end on Friday. As I sat talking to God during worship. I realized something about myself. I am the kind that when I fail, my first instinct is to hide, work hard get a better result before showing myself again. When I did not do so well in my exam on Wednesday, my instinct was to work hard and do better in the next exam before talking to God again. As if, I was trying to prove that my better performance made me worthy to ask for his help in the previous and next exam (angels should make the lecturer favour my papers, since that’s my last resort). And I realized that if truly I was God’s child and representative, I am meant to report to him after each exam whether i...

    Are you writing AEC 511 or FSN? This lecturer was using his loud voice to scare away the formulas and answers I had used hours to store in my memory, I felt like telling him to keep quiet but remembered that it was getting pissed at the invigilator in my last exam for doing the same thing that made my memory disorganized so I calmed down. I could not really picture my note to remember methods of data collection and their examples as well as the formulas for Kruka Wallis tests and spearman rank correlational coefficient in 5c and 5d. After putting down the parts my memory could offer, I was so frustrated. The three questions were 16 marks altogether and forgetting the formulas meant I was getting at least 4 marks. So for a split second I thought “I wish I could go into the toilet and check my note for the formulas” The thought was shocking. This was the first time that I had boldly completed any thought on cheating since that embarrassing time in JSS1 (my first Ag...

  Hmmm, I just checked my financials i.e. how I spent my income this month and my heart is broken💔😩, why won’t these tears😭 just come out? How did I end up making a mistake as big as this? Apparently I spent all my income without saving anything, instead I touched my savings. To feel better, I want to think of the savings spent as emergency fund, started listening to grown woman by Beyoncé but right now I don’t want to grow(adulting is the biggest scam😒), switched to miracles by Sia,it says …If you wanna beat your chest 'cause you feel the emptiness Go on and feel your loneliness Go on and feel your loneliness Then call me 'cause we're both in this… The song was made for times like this. Putting my stomach in the bank seems like the solution to this money allocation issue. I invested in skincare, at the time it made sense but now it makes no sense. For next month, I’m tempted to pay no tithe but I will (it’s a plus not a minus), torn between applauding mysel...

  Recently, I saw a this or that challenge with Tolulope Solutions and her sisters on IG. This matter has never graced my mind until I saw that video “which group do I belong to high or low maintenance? This was my perception at the time High maintenance -these ladies are hailed by their peers and admirers (mostly guys)as “Babes” their skin is on fleek, members of slayers.ng and classy Low maintenance – these ladies are the ones that people settle for when they don’t consider themselves up to the high maintenance geng. Most times, they are frugal. The LM crew are seen as frugal spenders  always sacrificing to invest to provide a better future for themselves. To be honest, I love saving to invest but I also want to be called a babe and more. After listening to Ubong king’s  ”lessons to learn from a prostitute” and he explained that looking good is good business. I realized that high maintenance isn’t really about how much money you have in your account or how people rate y...

19th  January …an alarm that reminds me that time waits for no man. Sometimes I dread the day, sometimes I’m excited. This year, I’m  at peace, simply because I have no ounce of pressure on myself. I always tell God “This year,it’s me and you oo” I just want to learn more of God and myself. I have no regrets, I’m not sad because of anything I have failed at so its really like I am taking no baggage into the new age I feel light and free.  I’m graduating this year and the bills associated with adulthood are already waiting for me, at least at the end of this year, they would come with full force. Funny enough I have no  fear at the moment, tomorrow or something other time, I would get scared but deep down I trust God. I want to be independent of my parents but fully dependent on the one that owns silver and gold. I mean God gat me. So with this I enter into a new decade of my life in a few days with confidence that the year would be amazing. I am so grateful, you grac...

To be honest, blogging is something really foreign to me. I used to love writing fiction but it has become one of the things I am uncertain about. You know when you like something but you doubt if you have the strength to be consistent at it but your reason for loving it is certain. Consistency is extremely important to me and whatever I do has to be sustainable. You become like this when legacy has stayed in your subconscious till it begins to rule your decisions. My friend and sister asked me “How far your blogging?” and to be honest I had no clear answer. Amongst all my excuses, the foundation of the decision was” I really hate being inconsistent especially when I miss  deadlines making it obvious . I decided to continue blogging “why?” because this blog is called new adults and I don’t think I am the only one struggling with being  consistent with personal goals so I’ll keep writing even when there is no ginger,when I do not deliver on time because if I quit I will never l...

Investment is one of the most popular words right now. It is impossible that one friend or the other has not advertised an investment opportunity to you. The usual format -“ you put X amount in and in the next Y days your money has increased or you would have to bring  X amount of people to make more money. This article is not to discourage you from engaging in it but to give advise on the do’s of investments. Important information to be obtained before you invest 1. Get information on how the system works. Ensure you get the full details about the investment material (stocks, bitcoin, agricultural products etc.)  from several people and the internet before you go ahead. Don’t be too lazy to read about this investment or to scared to ask questions- You are investing, your hard earned cash. Please be careful. 2. Obtain counsel from someone that knows more about investments. 3. Ensure that you decision is not ruled by greed. 4. Ensure the investment platform is trustwort...

When the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable. After a particular program in school where purpose was the topic, I went to an empty room of the fourth floor and burst into tears. Behind these tears was great fear “I am totally clueless on what God has sent me to earth for and if I don’t find it, what do I tell God on judgment day?” When I found my voice I began to beg God “Please show me your vision for my life”. After weeks of expecting a loud voice in my ears or having an encounter in my dreams, frustration kicked in and I got  determined to do with my life as I pleased since God was not answering (so I thought). During a meeting with my mentor at the time, Dr Azubike Ezenwoke, he said “God is more willing to show his purpose for your life than we are willing to know it”. This put my mind at rest and I remembered that there is  time for everything with God. At that point, I might have lost interest in school and jumped on the train if my purpose was revealed ...

Consistency is the key to success. Jumping from one thing to another puts us at stage 1 of everything. Consistency has always been my major problem. Consistency in my service unit, relating with new friends, business, projects, resolutions, relationship with God etc. I am the type that gets pumped with energy, great possibilities at the beginning but with increasing challenges along the way my vibe drops and I remember why I started but the reasons losses importance to me as I continue. I started a new habit of waking up by 6am going out to listen to the word, meditate, praise God, exercise and plan for the day for an hour. I did it for two weeks with great results but I started having problems with sleeping early and then rain was always falling this made me relent. Now I’m like not again!!!!!!! The major reason why I became inconsistent was that I did not remind myself of the purpose I started in the first place. I wanted each day to be used wisely and that morning ritual was meant t...

Conflicts are inevitable in life and can have positive impact on the individuals if done right. Recently, I got involved in an argument where someone made a statement about authority in male and female relationships and I was upset. I could have avoided saying anything but the statement triggered me and I choose to respond even though I tried my best to remain respectful of his opinions while stating mine I failed at my initial goal which was to give him a reason to change his perspective. Days following this conflict, I kept thinking of why his opinion said innocently will read several meanings to people of different backgrounds and experiences. My book for the month is The Richest Man that ever lived and in chapter 9 which talks about Solomon’s steps to winning conflicts and overcoming adversity. The steps from this book has shown me where I did wrong and ways to improve. • Understand the purpose or goal of conflict – conflict is meant to help attain the best results and help all i...

Going to the university is such a big deal that we organize family meetings, go through university brochures trying to find the course that fits us most. To be a lawyer, you must like arguing, engineer: you must be good in maths, theatre arts: you must have been in your school drama club, journalism: you must be a good speaker. All these are amazing but there are simple ways to know the course you must study but before I suggest the best ways to discover your course of study, let me share my experience. In my head, I’ve always been jack of all trades so I wanted to be a doctor simply because I cleaned my injuries, economist because I found out I liked taking care of money, cosmetologist because it made everyone I told look at me with respect, engineer because I repaired the TV and an antenna once but to be serious technical drawing wearied my soul and physics made me sick  and then one day in ss2 after practising physics for hours without getting the answer. I thought to myself, I ...

An important attribute of a person is their memories. The ability to remember events, words, people encounters, and fragrances is so essential,that when lost, we conclude that the individual will be unable to live to their full potential. As important as making new memories is to our lives, deleting the ones that serve as garbage to our minds, is of great necessity. I used to be a walking encyclopedia for the harms done to me. It was a prized possession, it gave me enough reasons to cry when I felt down, enough reasons that I had every right to be pitied and given attention. In my head I was like, “you don’t know what they’ve done to me” but the truth was that I did not know the damage I was doing to myself. The Lord’s prayers says; “...and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us…” Imagine yourself as a phone with 64GB of storage. You would agree with me when the storage is full, the phone becomes:  • Slow • Overheats • Cannot accommodate new and...

Today we are talking about savings and God knows that I’m still a learner. Quick Back Story I used to save diligently when I was younger in bags, containers and with my mom( greatest mistake ). But I got frustrated because one particular sibling of mine was always stealing my savings, and some will borrow money from me and will not pay back. I can never forget when my elder sister borrowed 65 naira from me and refused to pay back (I mourned that money for days). It’s a laughing matter now but then I wasn’t smiling.  There was also a time I forgot 170 naira in my primary school and I walked back to school, it was more than a 30 minutes journey. All these occurrences made me discouraged and the discipline to save left me. I got into the university and because I wanted to have so much savings, I would save amounts that made me lose weight because I wasn’t eating.  And also I always had issues with helping people out with money because I would do it at my own detriment at the end ...

Self  esteem is an individual’s perception of his/her self worth. I was also a victim, I cannot remember when it started but I can remember I always wanted to hide, sometimes in lockers, I hated meeting new people because I felt less than everyone else, there was no will to try new things because I believed I would fail anyways.  This perception made me live  below my full potential but I have passed the test now. The following are the ways I used to build up my self esteem, you can do it too. • Identify the things that make you feel bad about yourself and write down the opposite. E.g. I am not beautiful Opposite: I am beautiful • Recite the opposite of those negative thoughts and reaffirm yourself. Say it even if you don’t believe it at first. • Change your environment Your environment consist of the music,words,people you listen to. Start listening to positive words, music etc. and stay away from toxic people. I would recommend "love myself" by Hailee Steinfeld • ...

The first encounter Moses had with God seems like a story most of the time but recently I was moved to read it again and see what I found from Exodus 3 and 4. 1. Curiosity is indeed the mother of revelation and invention.  3:3-4a And Moses said, I will now turn aside, and see this great sight, why the bush is not burnt. And when the LORD saw that he turned aside to see … God set a situation to catch the attention of Moses, he wanted to see if Moses was curious enough. Are you curious, do you wait to examine things around you, are you so attentive to your life and environment to notice the minute changes? 2. God called him and he answered. 3:4b God called unto him out of the midst of the bush, and said, Moses, Moses. And he said, Here am I… Just like the call of Samuel, God called them and they answered. It is possible they could have run away out of fear. Look within are you running from God’s call? 3. God introduced himself. 3:6 Moreover he said, I am the God of thy father,...

."Entrepreneur" is the word of the decade and while some are making progress others are failing woefully like the old me. My friend and I are always talking about one business idea or the other. After calculating our expected profits, we get so excited and forget to ask important questions and then we start and fail again. I usually thought we were just not committed enough until a recent failure that put my brain to work. These are a list of questions you should ask to know if  that business idea is worth pursuing. Do this before you even calculate your expected profits. 1.What problem is my product or service going to solve or what value is my product/service adding to the customer? 2. What makes my product/service  different from my competitors? This is usually your selling point. 3..What are the possible problems I am going to face? Problems differ from acquiring start up capital to source of inputs for your  products, delivery of products, acquisition of a reliable w...

Matt 6 :33 has been the anthem in the winners family for some years now. I never really paid attention as a nonchalant Christian that said amen to everything and did nothing about it. It felt like one of those things they say in church . After I gave my life to Christ ,I started to give the scripture more thought but I had not gotten the insight that moves people into  action. During the 7 days prayer and fasting conducted in winners, as Matt 6:33.was emphasized again and again, the  goldmine in the scripture was revealed. "Seek ye first the kingdom of God..." This means to make Christ purpose on earth which is reconciling the lost souls to the kingdom of God your priority. A lot of people are suffering from problems, when the solution is already available which is  Christ. Every believer should join the task force to restore them back to hope, and their birthright in Christ. "Every other thing shall be added to you". This means Exodus 23:25 – 26 becomes your portio...